Cut(s) and print

cut s and prints

At first you don’t know how to react. You just feel stupid, in a weird kind of way. Indifference. You take it as a joke while everything around you fades out.

You can’t see or hear anything anymore. Then, reality comes back, slapping you right in the face, almost knocking you off your feet, and when you realize the gravity of the situation, you snap out of it… and you sink into the deepest, darkest, most frightening places inside of you, the ones you near knew existed… surrounded by shadows of the past,, whispering gibberish that you can’t understand… and you succumb in such a depression, a sadness mixed with fear, you can’t see anything but your worst, you see yourself as the lowest creature on earth, sitting naked in a dark corner…so miserable, even the crows won’t feed on your rotting body… you don’t feel like eating. Even smoking seems unappealing. There’s no life left in you. Until… the anger comes…

Oh boy! The anger… filled with sorrow, you start screaming inside. You stand up, mighty and tall, as your god-like fury scares away the shadows. Your blood starts to boil and you could take on the whole world by yourself. All you see is black holes, you yourself become a black hole, growing ever bigger, sucking everything in; every word sounds like an offense towards you. Just the fact that you can’t hit anyone or smash anything makes you even angrier. It’s like a virus, a plague, slowly spreading through your body, infesting every bit of common sense in you until there’s none left.

In this corrupted state of mind, you don’t feel pain, you start to smoke again, setting your lungs on fire, but you don’t care, you’re invincible! You keep at it, like this for a while, handing out killer looks to anyone unfortunate enough to cross your path… until you’ve burnt out all the energy and there’s nothing left of the flame inside of you but cold grey ashes… you’re cold and empty inside, just blank, betrayed, no more power to feel anything, you stare in empty space and no thought goes through your mind… you’re dead. You just don’t give a fuck anymore and finally decide to let it go.

These are the effects of the most powerful drug without a name, and wether you like it or not, you will take it involuntarily someday… this has been my experience with it. I left. And I ain’t coming back. Adios!

Mike… and I’m out.

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